Editor's Note: The passage is the vision of a sister who used to be a prostitute. Now she has become a Christian and daughter of God. She is willing to spread the gospel of God even though she still cares about comments from other people. Her testimony and story are as follows:
My Family
I was born in the 1980s in a reformed family. My family was harmonious and everyone treated me well. Chinese are introverted and not good at expressing their feelings. Although we were not rich, we lived a decent life.
My father was an ordinary worker. My mother married my father when I was two years old. My mother was a housewife, taking care of the whole family. My two brothers are my father' children with his ex-wife. My whole family was atheistic and didn't believe any region. My father said he only believed in himself, so he worked hard for our family.
Rebellious Girl
After I entered junior high school, my father quitted his job and started a business in order to provide a better life for our family. My mother also helped him all day long. They left the house early in the morning and worked late into the night. They seldom stayed with me.
I was gradually tired of school and started to hang around with a gang of youths. Many boys chased after me so I began to notice the love between men and women. I paid little attention to my study and was drunk in romance.
Once upon a time my boyfriend broke up with me. I wrote it in my diary. My mother happened to read it and laughed at me. My heart was hurt, although I know she was not on purpose. She just cared about me in the wrong way.
I didn't listen to my parents and often let them down. My father told me that they were not my natural parents. I was transferred to another school where my natural father worked as a teacher. I felt that I was abandoned so I was more rebellious. I still ignored my study even in my natural father's school. I often skipped class and gave myself tattoos.
My natural father gradually found that he couldn't discipline me, so I returned to my nursing father 's home and was transferred to the county' s another secondary school. One day my natural father came to visit me at school, but I ignored him. He had been a stranger in my eyes.
On that day when I came home from school, I saw my natural father sitting in our home. I didn't know what he was discussing with my nursing father. I hated them. My self-pity and inner rebellion made me even more reluctant to study.
My personality was gradually distorted and went to extremes. I didn't listen to any word of my parents. I went against their ideas on purpose. Finally, I dropped out of school.
After dropping out of school, I wandered around my hometown for a summer vacation. My nursing parents sent me to a private high school with their money. Now I understand that they really loved me. However, I was not aware of their love when I was a teenager.
I decided to study hard in the high school and try my best to enter the university. However, former friends still contacted me. I started to skip class and mixed with them again. The school asked me to leave. I completely hurt my parents' hearts.
My brother came to pick me up from the school. On our way home, he denied that I was his sister in front of his friends. I felt shamed and despised.
I was found pregnant later on. My mother took me to abort. They had a talk with my natural parents about my problems. None of them was willing to take care of me.
I knew I was disliked. Finally, they decided to take me to my natural parents' house because many guests often went to my nursing parents' home. It was a shame to let others know about the abortion.
Although my body recovered health after half a month, but their attitude towards me has made my heart dead.
I started smoking. In addition to daily conversation, I almost had no communication with my parents. I concealed my heart.
I knew that I was not a good girl. No one would like such a shameless girl. But I still wanted to be loved and cared about. I hoped for correct guidance.
Escape Arrangement of My Fate
Parents were also worried about my future and they arranged a blind date for me. I was at a loss and didn't know what to do.
The man I was dating with was not bad in every way. I tried to accept the arrangements of my fate and agreed to marry him.
However, I began to think of my life seriously. I didn't want to marry a man who I didn't love. I decided to go out and have a look at the outside world.
I let my parents reject the man and returned the engagement gifts. I was grateful to my parents since they never forced me. They respected my decision and gave me freedom to choose my life.
In the summer of 2004, I was at the age of 18 and got my ID card. I took some money and said goodbye to my parents. I left my hometown and went alone to another city. I want to decide my life, although I didn't know where to go and how the future would be.
