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Sunday, October 02, 2022
church & ministry
Pastor Shares How to Nurture Male Believers: 'Their Relationships With God Are the Most Important Thing'
A picture shows some men gathering.A picture shows some men gathering.

After God’s calling came upon him, Pastor C engaged in pastoring male members, gaining much rewarding experience. During his 20-year pastoral ministry in south China, about two-thirds of the people under his care are married male believers. Recently, the Christian Times, an online Chinese Christian newspaper, interviewed him and summarized some of his pastoral experiences and insights, hoping to bring some inspiration and reflection to pastors and church staff.

The pastor adopts a dynamic and diverse way to lead male Christians in gathering. In other words, each participant is an independent speaker in the service when people pray together, read the Bible, praise God, and share personal testimonies and insights from the Word. He also provides courses for them about marriage relationships, parenting, and children's education, encouraging married believers to strive to be good husbands and fathers in their families and single ones to participate in church service and take pre-marriage courses.

One of Pastor C's visions for male members under his care is that they may become good examples in different areas of life: "good husbands who love their wives, good fathers who love their children, good sons who care for their parents, good employees with the sense of responsibility, good bosses, and good helpers for pastors".

After leading male believers for many years, Pastor C concluded, "Men’s problems are largely from the workplace, family, and personal life, mostly about money, power, and sex. And pastors are responsible to help them learn to discern, reject and transcend these problems."

He believes that the most important thing is a male member's relationship with God who can lead him to repent since it is impossible for a man who does not know God to change his heart.

He also confessed, “Leading female Christians is much easier than leading male ones who often come to the church with arrogant attitude to rationally judge the pastor before him. He evaluates the pastor’s ability to solve his problems, based on which he will choose whether or not to follow the pastor’s guidance. Therefore, those who lead male believers have to become leaders themselves first, with practice in the Bible's teaching. No man will follow the guidance of a pastor failing to show the power of faith in his life with the lack of spiritual influence. Though pastors’ authority is given by God, what matters more is their insights and abilities to solve people’s problems.”

“As for leading rational male Christians who love to give suggestions, I choose to delegate authority to him and give him the opportunity to lead freely. If he succeeds, we will encourage him with applause. If he fails, he will learn to be humble with reflection,” the pastor said. 

"And for those male ones who love complaining, first of all, I need to know the underlying reasons for their complaints. Normally, these men lack a good sense of security as they failed to receive enough love. Then, as their pastor, I will help them realize their problems and gain a sense of security at a slow pace through continuous prayer, communication, companionship, and substantial help. When they receive encouragement and support through fellowship with others in the church, and fulfillment in God’s love, their complaining thoughts and words will gradually disappear. Eventually, such male members will apologize to their wives in their family, promoting harmony among family members," he added.

- Translated by Alvin Zhou 

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